Ukuba usandula ukuphupha usana kwaye ungazi ukuba ulutolike njani, ungoyiki, naku ndikuzisa isisombululo: kweli nqaku ndiza kukugcina uvukile Kuthetha ukuthini ukuphupha abantwana. Uninzi lwamaxesha apho siphupha into kufuneka siyicacise ngalo mzuzu kuba inxulumene nomsitho osondeleyo kuloo mzuzu. Ngaba wakhe waziva ukuba kufuneka vumela umntwana ngaphakathi kuwe? Ekuziphatheni kwakho kwakhona njengasebuntwaneni bakho, ngaphandle kwalo naluphi na uhlobo lwexhala?
Ngokuqhelekileyo abantwana bafanekisela ubumsulwa, ukonwaba, inkululeko, kunye nothando lwento yonke. Kodwa ukuphupha ngayo kunokuba nokutolika okuninzi kuxhomekeke kwimeko ekuboniswa yi-subconscious. Umzekelo, unga uphupha umntwana owonwabileyo, osandul 'ukuzalwa, okhalayo, ogulayo okanye ofileyo. Ngaba umbala omdaka okanye omdaka? Ngaba icocekile okanye imdaka? Ngaba usisityebi okanye ulihlwempu? Umxholo ngamnye utolikwa ngendlela eyahlukileyo. Bazi bonke ngezantsi.
Kuthetha ukuthini ukuphupha umntwana?
Eyona ntsingiselo inkulu, njengoko benditshilo, inxulunyaniswa nobunyulu bomphefumlo, ubumsulwa kunye noncumo oluqhubekayo. Abantwana bahlala bonwabile kwaye bayisasaza kubantu ababathandayo. Iphupha le-psychoanalysis lichaza ukuba xa uphupha ngabantwana, inokuba kungenxa yokuba uxinezeleke kakhulu kwaye ukuqonda kwakho kukubuza ikhefu, ukuba uthathe izinto ngokungakhathali, njengoko usana ngokwalo beluya kwenza, lisebenzise la maxesha kwaye lubenze eyahlukileyo.
Kwaye eneneni, iingcali nge-oneirology azilunganga, kuba umntwana uhlala engayityanga intloko njengabantu abadala, uyathanda ukuya esikolweni ukuze abone abahlobo bakhe (jonga ukutolikwa malunga Abahlobo besikolo), abaze bazisole kwaye bazinze ngokuba banento yokudlala ezandleni zabo. Kwelinye icala, ungaziphupha uyinkwenkwe okanye intombazana. Xa wawuneminyaka emihlanu ubudala, loo nostalgia igqitha kwimithambo yakho kwaye ikwenze ufune ukubuyela kwelo nqanaba lethenda nelokungakhathali. Yimemori elula kwaye i-subconscious ikwenza ubone ukuba ngoku ungonwabela ubomi kwaye ulandele amaphupha akho kanye njengokuba wenzayo xa wawusemncinci.
Oku kunokuba kukutolika ngokubanzi, ukwazi ngokunzulu ukuba iphupha lakho lithetha ntoni kufuneka uthathele ingqalelo iinkcukacha ezingaphezulu, Cinga ngomzuzu okhoyo kunye nayo yonke into obukhe wayicinga xa uleleyo: Kulapho kuphela apho siya kuthi sifumane eyona ntsingiselo yalo mbandela. Masiyiqhekeze kwiinkcukacha ezithe kratya.
Olunye utoliko kunye neempawu zamaphupha kunye namakhwenkwe namantombazana
Impikiswano yokuqala ivela xa phupha abantwana abaswelekileyo. Ngokwenyani, intsingiselo akufuneki ukuba ibe mbi. Mhlawumbi unabantwana kwaye ubuntu bakho obukhuselayo buyakukhumbuza ukuba kufuneka ubakhathalele ukuze ungaphulukani nabo.
Uyoyika ukubona unyana wakho esifa. Umntwana oswelekileyo unokuchazwa ukuba kuthetha ukuba awuzithandi iintsana.
Yiyo loo nto abantu abadala abaninzi begqiba ekubeni bangabi nabo abantwana. Ilula ngoluhlobo. Ukuba uqhubeka nokuba nephupha elibi, thetha neqabane lakho okanye umntu omthembileyo kwaye wabelane ngezinto ezikukhathazayo.
Iphupha labantwana abonwabileyo. Imele imeko emsulwa yolonwabo, ngokungathi ubona umfanekiso wosana oluhlekayo.
Ibonisa ukuba ukwinqanaba elihle kakhulu ebomini bakho, apho ufuna ukuncuma kuphela kuba umsebenzi wakho uhamba kakuhle, ubudlelwane bakho yindlela obathanda ngayo. Ngaphandle kwamathandabuzo, lelinye lawona maphupha mabalaseleyo onokuba nawo: abantwana abonwabileyo.
Kuthekani ukuba badakumbile kwaye bayalila? Ukuba ngexesha lephupha uyaqonda ukuba, endaweni yokonwaba, abantwana bayadana, inokubonisa ubuntu bakho bokungazithembi.
Xa belahlekelwe ngabazali, ngenxa yokuxhomekeka kwabo kubo, usizi lubagubungele lukhatshwa kukungazithembi.
Ngenxa yoko, baqala ukulila. Ngaba kwenzeka ntoni kuwe? Zibekele imiceli mngeni emibini okanye emithathu kwaye xa udibana nayo, uyakubona indlela uvuyo olubuyela ngayo entliziyweni yakho kwaye awuzukuphinda uve lusizi.
Ngaba zizelwe? Iintsana ezisandul 'ukuzalwa sisiqalo sexesha elitsha, utshintsho olukhulu oluza kuguqula indlela yakho yobomi.
Utshintsho, kwifayile ye- amaphupha nosana olusanda kuzalwa, bahlala benethemba. I-Psychoanalysis inika intsingiselo yokuvuthwa kuwe, oko kukuthi, ubuntu bakho buyakhula kwaye ukhulisa izakhono ezintsha eziza kukunceda ufezekise impumelelo.
Iphupha ngabantwana abagulayo. Isifo sibonakalisa ukonakala kunye nelahleko. Xa uneli phupha, oko kunokuthetha ukuba woyika ukusilela kubudlelwane bakho bezothando okanye ukugxothwa emsebenzini.
Iintsana ezigulayo ziboniswa zingakhuselekanga kwaye zinexhala. Ukuba ufuna ukukhupha umoya, xelela umntu omthembileyo ukuba ukhathazekile kwaye eli phupha liyakunyamalala.
Kananjalo, ukuba uyakwazi ukunyanga ukugula kwakhe ngelixa uleleyo, oko kuthetha ukuba uyasokola ukuya phambili, uphawu lobugorha bakho. Ukuba yi-Down syndrome, iya kuba nzima ngakumbi.
Ukuba sisiporho, kunokwenzeka ukuba usandula ukuphulukana nomntwana kwaye emaphupheni akho kubonakala kunjalo. Ngamanye amaxesha, ayisiyomntwana, kodwa lilungu losapho okanye umhlobo ovela kuwe njengesiporho, ophazamisa iiyure zakho zokuphumla.
Kwakhona, imimoya inokufuzisela uloyiko lwelahleko enjalo, kwimeko leyo ithi lukhulu malunga nawe ngenxa yothando oluvayo kuloo mntu. Funda nzulu malunga nokuphupha malunga neziporho.
Iphupha labantwana abaqaqambileyo. Izinwele ezimhlophe luphawu lomphefumlo ococekileyo kunye nococeko. Kuthetha ukuba unentliziyo enkulu, ezantsi usoloko unceda abanye xa beyifuna, unika isandla sakho kumahlwempu.
Intombazana emhlophe imele iingelosi ezinxibe ezimhlophe. Okuchaseneyo kuya kuba ziintsana ezimdaka, kwimeko apho kungatolikwa njengokuthi uzive uzisola ngokungcatsha umntu okanye ngenxa yokuba loo mntu ukungcatshisile kwaye ngoku ubaphupha ngathi ingumntwana omdaka, ombi.
Ngaba usisityebi okanye ulihlwempu? Yinkcukacha engenamsebenzi, enentsingiselo enzulu. Eli phupha lifuzisela ubuntu bakho bokomoya okanye bezinto eziphathekayo.
Ukuba uyahlula ukuba ulihlwempu okanye usisityebi, kungenxa yokuba ukhathazeka ngemali kunye nezinye izinto. Endaweni yokuba ulihlwempu, woyika ukuphulukana nezinto onazo, okanye ukusilela kwiprojekthi eya kukhokelela ekonakaleni. Camngca ngezigqibo zakho zokukhetha umendo ochanekileyo.
Ulahlekile, usengozini, ulahliwe, okanye urhaxiwe? Utoliko luyafana nolo lwangaphambili. Xa umntwana omncinci erhaxwa, elahleka, okanye imeko efanayo eyenzekayo, kubonisa ukungazithembi kwicala lakho.
Uloyiko lokuphulukana nepropathi okanye abahlobo lukuhlasela ebusuku kwaye i-subconscious ikufundisa ukuze ubeke isicombululo kuyo. Kwenzeka into efanayo xa bengalunganga, bekhubazekile, bakhubazekile okanye abantwana abakhethekileyo.
Okokugqibela, ukuba bayabaleka kwaye bayadanisa, oko kubonisa ukuba uhamba inqanaba lokonwaba, kwaye ukuba uphupha amawele, oko kuthetha ukuba imvakalelo yakho yolonwabo iphindwe kabini.
Ezihlobene:
- Kuthetha ukuthini ukuphupha usana olusanda kuzalwa?
- Kuthetha ukuthini ukuphupha ibhokisi yomntwana?
- Intsingiselo yokuphupha malunga neziporho ezimbi
- Amaphupha malunga nomhlobo okanye udade elila
Ukuba eli nqaku malunga Kuthetha ukuthini ukuphupha abantwana, emva koko ndincoma ezinye ezinxulumene nazo kwicandelo lamaphupha aqala ngalo N.
ucocekile, uhlambe umntwana obhathile?
ayizi kweli phepha.
Ndiphuphe umtshana wam elala esifubeni sam, endisinda, etsala ii-braids zakhe embiza ngegama lakhe, ekhwaza, emva koko umntu wagqitha apha ebhedini ezosela okanye ashiye into kwindawo yokulala ebusuku.
Ukulandela oko ndibona ebumnyameni ukukhanya okuvela kwiscreen sefowuni ukuba xa ndiyithatha ephupheni ayikhanyisanga, ngelixesha ndiqhubeka ndizama ukususa umtshana wam esifubeni sam ngokutsala ii-braids zakhe, ubuso bakhe babumhlophe bumnyama buphela Amehlo, impumlo yakhe yayincinci kwaye imilebe yakhe ifana nentombazana yaseTshayina (yayingathi bubuso be-geisha) ngasemva kwegumbi yayingumama wakhe (udadewethu) emwola, wandixelela ukuba ebekhona, naye ...
Xa ndathatha umtshana wam (omnye umtshana wam kuba wayefana naye), ndakhwaza igama lakhe ndazama ukuvusa umyeni wam owayelele ecaleni kwam, andazi nokuba ndambetha nyani na, kodwa nini Ndivukile wandigona wandiqinisa, ngoba ndivuke ndalila ...
Molweni, ndiphuphe bebulala abantwana bebala nabazali babo babathatha babafaka kugqatso, banxibe ezimhlophe kwaye banegazi elininzi, baxinene kwaye abazali babo babaculele ingoma ndanomsindo omkhulu ndifuna Yenza into kuba andiqondanga ukuba kutheni bababulala besiya kuwa mnyama
Molweni .. Ndiphuphe amantombazana amabini amhle kakhulu, ndaya kuwo ndawabona ngamehlo enenyembezi .. intombazana yandibuza, kutheni ndilayita amakhandlela, ndamphendula, yintoni yonke le nto, kwaye wandixelela. uthini ngabazali bakhe abakholelwa ... Ndimxelele ukuba unaye umntu amthandayo ezulwini, jonga ezulwini kwaye ubuze iingelosi ezincinci ukuba zimkhusele ... kwaye undixelela ukuba ndinaye umntu ezulwini, ndamphendula Umama, ndiyambuza ndifuna ukonwaba, kwaye umama uyayibuyisela kum, ndine-❤uyolo lwam.Ndaphendula amantombazana..omnye wandixelela ukuba akakwazi ukuvula, abazali bakhe babeza kuba nomsindo .. Ndibaxelele ukuba mabazole lonto .Ndibanike ikhandlela, andincumele la mantombazana mabini..xa ndivuka ndivulele bonke abantwana abangenakuzenzela ikhandlela, ukuze bonwabe .. ENKOSI .. IMITHAMBO ENKULU .. YOLI
Ndiphuphe ndisecaleni kwendlela ndabona intombazana emhlophe efuna ukuwela indlela kodwa ibuye umva. Xa ndibuguqula ubuso bam ndiyabona, itanki elinejubane elipheleleyo kwaye kwelinye icala lendlela kuhamba intombazana emnyama
ukuwela indlela, uyandibona, uyancuma abaleke eze nam evule iingalo kwaye, ndibaleke ndamsindisa, ndimwola ndamsindisa. Ndilahlekelwe lilizwi xa ndiyinika abazali bakhe
Molo, bendisandula ukuphupha ngathi ndiza ngebhasi ndikunye nomntwana omalunga ne-4 okanye i-5 yeminyaka ubudala kwaye xa ndiwela isitalato bekukho isithintelo esikhulu sokuphuma siye kwisitalato esikhulu, ngequbuliso isilwanyana esinobuso yethole kwaye kwangaxeshanye ukubonakala kwenja kunye nokuvota nge-drool ngokusebenzisa impumlo (okanye impumlo) kwaye wazama ukundihlasela kodwa isimanga kukuba yayikwenza kum kuphela hayi kumntwana kwaye eyona nto ndiyenzileyo ndizithethelele kwaye kwangaxeshanye ndikhusele umntwana, okwesithathu ndizama ukundihlasela, ndathatha intonga ndayibetha ebusweni emva koko ndaya phambili nomntwana ndathi xa ndifika endlini ndabona ukuba isilwanyana ibisiza kungxama, kodwa ibingenakundihlasela kuba ndingaphakathi endlwini.
Ndiphuphe ndisevenkileni kwaye kukho umntwana, andikhumbuli kakuhle ukuba kwenzeke njani kodwa umntwana wathi ndiyintombi yakhe, ibingumntwana omncinci, uneminyaka emalunga ne3, kodwa lonto iyandikhathaza nditsho ngakumbi xa umntwana eqhubekeka ukuya endlini yam, ndabaleka ndathi makahambe kodwa umntwana uqhubeke "nokuhlekisa" endihleka, lento imenze umsindo nangakumbi, kwezinye iimeko xa ndingamhoyanga umntwana Ukuvula isango lendlu yaM, kwenye umtshana wam uvele aphume endlini aqale adlale nomntwana, nangona kunjalo umama akamvumeli, emzuzwini kamva andikhumbuli ukuba kwenzeke njani okanye kwenzeka ntoni, kodwa bendinaye umntwana phambi kwakhe wamngxolisa esithi Uyekile ukundikhathaza, nangona kunjalo waqhubeka ehleka kwaye uyalubona ulonwabo ebusweni bakhe lokuba ndizise amanzi anencasa enomkhenkce esandleni sam ndawaphosa emntwaneni nasemntwaneni. ndaqala ukulila ndangcangcazela, ebusweni bam kubonakala ukuba nam andiyikholelwa into endiyenzileyo ... ndathatha umntwana ndathi kudadewethu ukuba andiphathele into ndigqume, udadewethu wandingcikiva ngesenzo esinje kwaye wandixelela ukuba yayingenabuntu ukwenza loo nto ... ngalo mzuzu ndazithethelela ngokuba andenzanga ngenjongo, indawo yokugqibela endiyikhumbulayo ngudade wethu othwele umntwana , umntwana ubhijelwe ngetawuli engcangcazelayo ngamehlo akhe acoliweyo ... ngaphandle koncumo awayenalo ngaphambili.
Andazi ukuba ndiyitolika njani le nto, andazi nokuba mandikhangele ukuba kuthetha ntoni na ukuba umntwana andilandele, andikhathaze, andenze intlekisa, into ethetha ukuba ndiphose umntwana emntwaneni, Ndihlasele umntwana…. Andazi, ndikhumbula nje into endiyenzileyo, ndiziva ndimbi kakhulu ... kutheni kuyinto endiqinisekile ukuba andinakuze ndiyenze okanye ndicinge ukuyenza. Wayengumfana ovuyayo ovele wandicaphukisa kodwa wonwaba kwaye andazi ukuba kutheni enomsindo kangaka ...
Molweni ndiphuphe umntana endanga endibamba ngesandla ndithetha naye akandiphendula bendingamboni bendimva nje ephupheni ndizamile ukuvuka kodwa andikwazi , Ndiye ndamyeka kodwa khange afune ukundikhulula.
Ndiphupha abantwana, amaxesha ngamaxesha phantse ndibasindisa kwimililo eyileyo njl. Ndiphantse ndihlala ndinabantwana endingabaziyo, nangona ngamanye amaxesha bengabantwana bam xa babesebancinci, ngoku badala
Ndiphuphe, ukuba ndidlula ngasemthini. kwaye ndothuswa kukubona ukuba kukho intombazana esiqwini, bendicinga ukuba ngumsebenzi wobugcisa kwaye ndabona ukuba uphefumla ngokuzolileyo, ndayikhupha kwangoko. xa ndihamba ndiyabona ukuba babengamawele amabini amahle. Emthini, ndathatha enye ENYE, ndazixabisa zombini ezingalweni zam. Abanye bacinga ukuba `` intombazana entle, umba kukuba andinakubaphendula, bandixelele ukuba ndiyasebenzisana nokutya. Xa ndiqaphela ukuba omnye wabo wenza ubuso ngokungathi ufuna ukumchamela, ecinga ukuba uyamqonda kwaye unegazi kwipanty yakhe. Ndiye ndagula bendizokuya emapoliseni ndiyokuxela. umntu othile undixelela ukuba nguGawulayo
Molweni, ndiphuphe umntana endixelela ukuba ndingumama wakhe, kodwa undixelele ukuba unentombazana ozohamba ngesikhephe kodwa wathetha nam ngothando oluninzi.
Molo, phezolo ndiphuphe umntu obuso bam ndingabubonanga buphethe usana olu blond, lomntu usondela kum umntana wandijonga ngovuyo wathi: "Mama? Mama?", Laphela ke iphupha.
Molweni ... ndiphuphe ngabantwana abathathu abaneebhondi, behamba ze bengondlekanga, bandidlula kwaye ephupheni lam ndaziva ndilusizi kakhulu
Ndiphuphe ezinye iiveve ezonwabileyo kwaye uncumo oluvela kuThixo ebebenalo bezizi-vlanquitos nge-rropita emhlophe kwaye yonke into ejikelezileyo ibimhlophe, konke bekuphosakele kangangokuba ndade ndathi ephupheni ukuba kwakuphosakele kakhulu ukuba ibe sisicaka, yayingalunganga kangangokuba yayingenawo amagama okuyichaza