Ukuba usandula ukubona imuvi apho benziwe khona ukuqweqwedisa ezinje ngeBoston Strangler, uxwebhu olubhaliweyo apho iingqondo zabaqweqeshi zichazwa khona okanye ibali elibuhlungu apho kufunwa umntwana, njengophawu lokuxabisa ubomi bakho, unokuba namaphupha afanayo. Kodwa akuyomfuneko ukuba ube ujongane nelihlo ukuze kwenzeke into embi engqondweni yakho. Kule nqaku ndicacisa kuthetha ukuthini ukuphupha uthimba.
Kodwa kuya kufuneka uyazi ukuba ukuxhwilwa ephupheni kunokuba ngenxa yezizathu ezininzi, ungasathethi ke ngempembelelo yomxholo kunye nemeko ohamba kuyo ngentsingiselo yephupha. Ayifani ube umqweqwedisi que kuthinjwa uze ubaleke, Ewe ukubulala kwenzeka okanye ukuba umntwana wakho, usana, okanye omnye umntu omthandayo uthinjiwe. Kungenxa yoko le nto kufuneka ukuba ufunde ezi nkcazo zilandelayo kunye novavanyo lwengqondo ngokweenkcukacha.
Kuthetha ukuthini ukuphupha ngokuxhwila?
Ngokubanzi, iingcali zichaza oko amaphupha apho umntu ekuthimbe unxulunyaniswa noloyiko lwehlazo eluntwini, okanye ukuphazamisa imfihlo yakho okanye inkululeko. Umzekelo, ukuba inkosikazi yakho ayikuvumeli ukuba uthenge imoto, ukuba abazali bakho abakuvumeli ukuba uye ekhonsathini, okanye ukuba utitshala wakho ukohlwaya ngaphandle kwesizathu, umphefumlo wakho "ubanjiwe." Kungenzeka ukuba ungaziva uchongiwe nentsingiselo yangaphambili, kuba kukutolika okungaqhelekanga. Kuya kufuneka wongeze umxholo wobomi bakho kunye nomxholo oboniswe yi-subconscious yakho, njengoko benditshilo ngasentla.
Ukubeka eminye imizekelo, oko akuthethi okufanayo ukuba uphupha ukuba umntakwenu uxhwiliwe, apho ubonakalisa uloyiko lokulahleka kwakhe, kunokuba umntu obhuqayo ephanga inkampani yamazwe aphesheya athimbe abathinjwa abaninzi, uzifumane ungaphakathi. Siza kubona amanye amaxesha axhaphakileyo kodwa ngakumbi iimeko.
Ukuphupha ngokuxhwila ngenxa yezoqoqosho
Ukuphupha ngokuxhwila ngenxa yeengxaki zemali. Ukuba utyikitye imali-mboleko ongakwaziyo ukuyihlawula, ukuba ufuna ukutshintsha isicwangciso senqanaba lomnxeba kodwa awukwazi kuba ukuhlala kwakho ziinyanga ezingama-24, ukuba uthembise ngento ekufuneka uyifezekisile. Kuzo zonke iimeko unokuziva ngentambo entanyeni yakho. Uqaphela ukuphulukana nenkululeko yakho yokukhetha kuba khange uqaphele isivumelwano osisayinileyo. Ngoku, ebusuku, ungqina ukuxhwila apho kuyakubiza ukuba ubaleke, kuba akukho ndlela yimbi ngaphandle kokuhlawula amatyala akho.
Ukuphupha ukuba ungumqweqwedisi
Ungumthimba? Uqweqwedisile umntwana, okanye usana lomntu? Xa ungabavumeli abanye banike uluvo lwabo okanye ungawaxabisi, ukuba awukhathali malunga nobomi babasebenzi bakho, ukuba awukuxhasi ukugxeka okwakhayo. Ukuba unyanzelisa yonke into kwaye awulixabisanga igalelo labanye, kuyo nayiphi na imeko uyayiphelisa inkululeko yokuthetha yabanye, ingathi ubathimbile. Kuya kufuneka ubumbe ubuntu bakho kwaye uvumele ngakumbi ukuze ungenzi amaphupha amabi ngokubiwa kwabantu.
Ukuphupha ndixhwilwe kwaye ndiyathobela
Ngakolunye uhlangothi, ukuba ungumntu othobelayo, othobela nawuphi na umyalelo ngokurhoxa kwaye kunzima kuwe ukuba uphakamise isandla okanye uthi "Kwanele", kuthetha ukuba oku uphawu lokuthobela Ingabonakala ngohlobo lwamaphupha apho uxhwilwa ngomnye umntu. Kwakhona, kulula ukutshintsha eso simo sengqondo kwaye uphakame xa ucinga ukuba kukho into eyenziweyo engalunganga, okanye ukuba umntu akalunganga. Kwenzeka into efanayo ukuba ukufumanisa kunzima ukunxibelelana nabanye abantu.
Ungaphupha uthinjwe xa indlela oziphethe ngayo eluntwini ithathwa njengengaqhelekanga. Ukuba awuyilandeli imithetho yentlonipho eluntwini, ukuba uphuma "kwizinto eziqhelekileyo" kwaye ungazamkeli izinto ezithile, ungathiwa ukrwada, kwaye oko kungakhokelela kumaphupha amabi malunga nokuxhwila. Umzekelo, ukwenza iibhotile ezinkulu nabahlobo bakho ebaleni, ungatsho ukuthi "Enkosi" ngalo lonke ixesha, ukuba nendlu emdaka ngokuthelekiswa nezinye. Kwezinye izinto uya kuba ulungile, kwezinye awuyi kuba. Xoxa nabahlobo bakho ngokukhululekileyo ukuze nenze izigqibo eziza kukuvumela ukuba uphumle kwakhona ebusuku. Soloko uzama ukubaleka.
Ngoku lifikile ixesha lakho. Unokwenza amagqabantshintshi ngamava akho kunye nabo bonke abafundi, ukuya ezantsi kwizimvo. Sisonke singafunda ukuhlalutya amaphupha asiphazamisayo nokusombulula amaxhala ethu.
Ngaba uyavuya?
Ezihlobene:
Ukuba eli nqaku beliluncedo kuwe malunga nantoni kuthetha ukuphupha uthimba, ke ndicebisa ukuba undwendwele ezinye ezinxulumene nezikwinqanaba lamaphupha kunye neleta S.
Ndiphuphe umntu ezama ukundixwila kodwa oyena mntu ufuna ukundithatha ebehlala engulaa mntu
Inokuba yoyikeka?
Ndaphinda ndaphupha emva kwexesha elide ukuba bandithimbe nodadewethu, kwindlu yam endala kwilizwe langaphambili endandihlala kulo, apho babulala intombazana sisahlala apho .. nantso ke isizathu sokuba sihambe ke hayi yazi ukuba ndiphuphe ngoloyiko okanye ndithini.
Ewe, inde kakhulu kodwa, ngaba kuyinto eqhelekileyo ukuba xa uphupha uva umzimba wakho usadilika kwaye unesiyezi?
Ndiphuphe ndiphuma ndiyokhangela indawo yokuhlala ndabaleka ndaya kwiqabane, ebenobubele kodwa ngaphakathi ebesisilo, kwaye yena (umfazi) engakhange abe krwada ... Wayesoyikisa, ubuso bakhe kwaye Umzimba ubukhubazekile kwaye babeneengcinga ezigqwethekileyo ... ndamqeshisela igumbi lokuhlala apho, mna nomninawa wam safumana into ebhetele, kodwa zange bandivumele ndiphume besoyikisa ngokundithathela umntakwethu babaleke .. .
Ndizamile amatyeli amaninzi ukubaleka nomninawa wam kodwa zihlala zisiza kusibamba.
Ndiphuphe ndiphuma eskolweni ndicinga kwaye bendisendleleni egodukayo kwabe kukho isithuthuthu esasisecaleni kwam siphantsi kwendoda etyebileyo eyayiphethe itshefu esandleni kwaye ifuna ukuzama ukuba ndindisholo ndikhwele isithuthuthu kodwa abakwazanga, mna ngeendlela zam ezimbalwa zokuzikhusela, ndizikhusele ndaluma isandla sakhe ndasiphinda kabini isandla sakhe, xa ndifuna ukubaleka phambi kokuba bandixhwithe, amapolisa avele nje kwaye ndakwazi ukuzisindisa, kodwa lowo ukuqhuba isithuthuthu sabaleka, kwaye lowo wayefuna ukundixwila Wazama ukubaleka kodwa akakwazanga kuba amapolisa ambamba.
Ibangelwa yintoni lonto ???
Impendulo nceda.